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It's moving day here, so I have all of my stuff packed up and ready to go. I'm just crossing my fingers that all of it will fit in the back of a truck, as I refuse to deal with a moving van.
It's such a strange feeling seeing everything you own in one neat little pile. I still feel like I have too much, but c'est la vie.

I feel really nervous and my stomach is tight. Probably because this will be the first time that I'm not living with some sort of parent figure around to be a safety net if shit hits the fan. Now that I'm moving off University property, this is my first "real" apartment. I'm scared, nervous and very excited. 

Of course, Residential Life left me with one more kick in the ass to make sure that I'm more "good riddance" and excited than scared. Apparently I have to leave on the 19th, no exceptions, even though I explained that I can't move into my apartment until June 1st. Can't we work something out? 

Of course not, because that's the way things work and if we started making exceptions the world would fall apart. 

Ah... bureaucracy. How I despise thee. 

So I'm camping out on my girl friend's couch for the next 12 days. But I'm so excited to have a little place of my own to decorate. 

I took a quick snapshot of my bedroom after we signed the lease, and the rest of the apartment is gorgeous and so much space! My bedroom is on the long and narrow side, so behind me is more space and a walk in closet. Also outside that window is the fire escape which leads directly to the rooftop. Sweet. 

I'm already thinking of what I want to do to it, after I clean up the shit that the previous tenant left. I already know I want to keep those gorgeous 20th century hardwood floors. They just need a good polish. We're ripping down those horrendous floral curtains and putting up something lighter, and the whole place needs a good coat of white paint. As for the rest... I need to wait and gather some inspiration. I've never dealt with interior design on a shoestring budget, but it can't be that much different than fashion! 

Visualize the Wishlist

I'm a very picky shopper. If I had enough of a budget to shop retail and money was no object, I'd be AN INCREDIBLY PICKY SHOPPER.
As it is, I tend to visualize exactly what I want in an item and I just have to wait until it trots on by.
Pour example,  I'm on the hunt for a pair of red pumps, 3.5 - 4.5 inch heel, patent leather, stiletto heel, almond toe, .5-1 inch platform. I'm looking for a black work blazer, slim cut, falling around hip length, no padding in the shoulders, two buttons, no pockets or extra buttons, notch lapels, tropical wool or thick cotton, long sleeves that are actually the correct length (good luck on that one).

Anyway, it's easy enough for me to find these items on say, Net-a-porter, but I've been waiting a year and change for these items to stumble into my life at a price I can also afford.

So my question is, am I just a little bit of a perfectionist or a crazy shopper? Or will you guys also wait over a year and make do until you find the perfect item?

The Dating Game

 I think it's funny how my girlfriends and I all approach dating differently. We all rate people based on three pretty simple factors: intelligence, looks, personality, and I like to add "charisma".

However, I'm queen of first dates. I tend to rely heavily on "charisma" or chemistry for lack of a better word, and if I don't feel that butterflies/fuzzy feeling/dizziness/stomach drop within the first ten or fifteen minutes this is probably not going to work between us.

As for the other three, my usual m. o. is that:
1. he must have all three.
2. the combined sum of all three must be at a certain level (ex. 7+7+7= 21, and so do 7+9+5=21)
3. none of these factors can drop beneath a certain level.

I am such a math geek, but I still think it's a sound system.

This is a long and drawn out post to say that I'm dating again and I happen to have two guys that have made it   to second dates and will possibly have thirds.

One is tall, drool-worthy and blonde, very smart and is quick in conversation, but is lacking in the personality department.
One is smart as hell, makes me laugh until I almost choke on my food, but he's short and while he's in good shape, his face isn't anything to write home about.

So my system has failed. They both pass it and we both have chemistry, so now what?

Let's Get Political

I figure this is my blog, I can post about things I like and things I find important. One issue that's near and dear to my heart is planned parenthood and sex education for various reasons.

I really truly believe that a lot of heart-ache could have been avoided for me and for those close to me if only we had had more information, but unfortunately the government isn't too thrilled about the idea that Americans have sex.
Yes we do.
Fact.

And I'm very upset by the thought that they are trying to cut funding for planned parenthood entirely, when it's such a little thing and can make such a big change in so many people's lives. We should be providing more funding, not less.

So take a moment, check out this political promo video, and repost it somewhere else if you feel as strongly as I do about this issue.

Sentimental Attachment

I had an unfortunate incident last weekend where I lost a shoe. I was up at my friend's house in Boston, and when I got home I realized I had one shoe, but not the other.

Look how lonely she is... : (

Depressing.
As soon as I realized this, of course I called her (and hopefully she'll find it), but I also felt a little sick.
How wrong is that? Feeling that upset over a piece of clothing?
Of course I realize it's ridiculous, but I felt the same way when I spilled soy sauce down the front of my white shirt. That one was a gonner too.

I'm still trying hard to be a minimalist, and learn to detach myself from clothing and remind myself that it's just a garment. It has no real value except what you paid for it.
Yet.... it still sucks to lose a favorite pair of shoes, and being a minimalist, they're ALL my favorite shoes.

What do you guys think? Do you ever get emotionally attached to clothing?

Coming Clean

 Don't get me wrong, my apartment is spotless (no thanks to my roommates : p) and damn it if I'll let a cockroach anywhere near the premises, but when it comes to my own cleanliness I've gotten a little looser.

I wash my hair maybe three times a week. Clothes like jackets, skirts, jeans get cleaned maybe once every six months. Unless I've been sweating I tend not to use soap in the shower every single day.
Now if that's gross, I'm sorry, but I've found that it works well for me. It means my hair and skin are less dry (less money spent on conditioners and body lotion) and as for my clothes, less money spent on dry cleaning and a spray of febreze or a few days in the freezer seem to work just fine.*

Best part is, apparently I'm not alone when it comes to my hair and at least Levi Strauss's executive agrees with me on the jeans.

Now I'm curious, how clean are you guys?

*Obvs if they're stained or dirty I wash them sooner, and same goes for my hair or body if I start to smell or look greasy. But, I figure if it doesn't look dirty, why wash it?

A Case for Red

Everyone knows how much of a neutral girl that I've become, and hey, I'm comfortable with it.
It simplifies things. I roll out of bed and grab enough clothing to cover my body, and it all matches. It also lets me experiment more with silhouette, length, material, and cut than I would be able to with color.

However, I will make an exception for red.
I only own one red piece, a great little cocktail dress, but I love it so.  So I feel like it might be time to add a few more red pieces to my wardrobe, I'm thinking a kick ass pair of stilettos and a little red dress for the day... what do you think?

The case for red really is that it is a serious attention grabber, since whenever we go out to a fancy occasion everyone says they just look for me in my red dress in a sea of lbds. It gives the appearance that you are a confident fiery personality (in this case, I'd say it's a fair assessment :) ). Also men are turned on by red. Weird, but scientifically true, according to this article.

Well, those reasons are good enough for me.

Red Patent Heels

Red Dress

Red Swing Jacket

Something Personal

Apparently I've managed to pick up a gentleman caller in the past month, from now on he will be known as the lawyer (just to keep things simple, you see).

So why the personal note? Because I notice that every time I go out on something even close to date territory, I realize that I only have three types of items in my closet.

Fashiony, man-repelling clothes that I enjoy immensely. Usually menswear, librarian, or office inspired. These are the clothes I'm in 90% of the time and therefore make up 90% of my closet.

Slightly trashy, I'm out clubbing with my girls clothes. You know you own them too.

Clothes that don't leave the house. Yoga pants, little boys boxers, and that college tee.

So now that I'm going on my fourth (!?)* date I'm afraid I'm panicking slightly.
What do I wear that looks half-way respectable, sexy, and cute? Something soft, touchable, that shows a little more skin than my usual. You know, that I just naturally roll out of bed looking this awesome, I'm sexy without even trying look.

And did I mention that the state of my underwear drawer is revolting? Yeah, it's pretty much all gym undies in there ladies.

But let's look on the positive side: so far the lawyer's sweet, charming, and tall**.   And we both have the same dry sense of humor which always helps ; ) So here's hoping that this one works out.

But here's a few things that I want to add to my closet for future dates:

Untitled by erind90 featuring lace bras

* Yeah, I haven't had to deal with third or fourth date drama for about seven months now. Just recycle those two same outfits for dates over and over and over and over...
** You don't understand how hard it is to find a guy that is taller than me when I'm 5' 9" and I want to wear my 3" heels when we go out, and of course my petite girlfriends are like "What? What's the problem?" with their 6'10" bfs. Gah.

Read Directions First

This is a PSA to all my readers who follow my method of washing clothes.

Normally I'm a big fan of just throwing all of my clothes into the washing machine on a delicate cycle with some woolite and calling it a day.

I've actually had pretty good success with this method, except that I found out one tag when it says "hand wash" and "dry clean only" they really do mean it.

Cashmere and merino wool.

If these aren't mixed with any other fibers, apparently they become matted by the agitation of the washing machine, and shrink. Kind of like when you felt wool or when you rat your hair to create dreads.

What this means is that I just had a perfectly good sweater that is now about the right size to fit an American Girl doll.

Goddammit.

Bodega Kitties

As anyone who has lived in NYC knows, rats are a HUGE problem. That and monstrous cockroaches.*

So most bodega owners keep a cat around, because as anyone knows, a cat is better than all the exterminators and poisons that money can buy.
Besides, look at the cuteness!
It makes me miss my own two fat tabbies that I left back in Boston so much....
Although, the only things that my cats hunt are bumblebees and shoelaces.

For the article I found on how health inspectors are trying to outlaw cats in bodegas, check it out here. Personally I think it's silly, I think it's much healthier to have a cat than to be spraying poison around food.

*Don't even get me started on the time I had to hunt down three of them that were living in our apartment. Ewww. Those things will not die.

Photos thanks to Buzzfeed

Much Love to Lands End

I have a serious soft spot for heritage brands, and with a pseudo-preppy style you can imagine my devotion to places like Brooks Brothers, Banana Republic, Lilly Pulitzer, Land's End, Sperry and L.L. Bean.

However, I just ordered a Breton striped shirt and cardigan from Land's End (they're having a super sale at their spin-off brand that j'adore: Lands End Canvas) and the little note I received just made me love them a little bit more:

While their sizes are a bit too generous (I had to return two shirts that I had ordered, much too big in the waist) if I ever have something that I don't mind being a bit slouchy, I will definitely order from them.

For the price, the quality is fantastic (with only a dud here or there, but what do you expect?).
The customer service and return policy is helpful and easy.
Their Canvas brand is a younger, trimmer, updated version of their old brand, which is great.

But that they send hand-written notes to thank customers?
Sold.
It's the little things that count the most to me, and I'll be sure to remember this personal touch if I ever open up my own store.

My Personal Nemesis

Vanity Sizing Cartoon from the New Yorker

I can't be the only person who thinks that it's wrong when I'm a size 8 or 10 in vintage, size 4 or 6 in boutique designer/UK sizing, and a 000 in US mall brands (if they ran that small, but that's what a tailor is for right?).

Who, exactly, are you trying to fool? 

I promise you that I'm not shrinking away, and yet, my sizes seem to indicate otherwise. 

That's why it cracks me up when people pull out the trivia that Marylin Monroe  was a size 12, so big is beautiful! 

Honey, Marylin Monroe also had a 23 inch waist. 

If we were best buds and went shopping at the mall today, she'd be about a size 2. 

Thanks to Already Pretty for finding this!

Tea Skirts

I've been eyeing this new hem length on the runways, from Fendi, Marc Jacobs and Louis Vuitton, and deciding whether it looks fresh or matronly.

I've finally decided that it's a refreshing change from the barely-there mini skirts that we've been seeing in the past. I love my legs, they're my favorite part, but it wouldn't kill me to put them away for a season or two (or at least once in a while).

Here's one of my favorite outfits from Fendi. It's still young and edgy looking even with the hem length and conservative style, which can veer into dowdy or 1950's period costume.

Photo Credit

Here's my interpretation of the look, with everything under $200 (of course).

Although, you probably own most of the items in your closet already. I know that I'm just missing the Longchamp bag and a tea-length skirt. As for the very loose interpretation of the purse, I detest logo splattered pieces of clothing. 

Of course, it's personal taste, but I feel that it's too flashy and "new money".

Because remember, "new money screams, but old money whispers". 

Luxury isn't about labels, but about fit, fabric and style. A little logo here or there isn't bad, like the little one stamped into the leather by Longchamp, but I don't want your logo emblazoned across my chest. If you're going to do that, you might as well pay me to be your walking billboard.

Fendi by erind90 featuring panel skirts

Blouses NOT for Five-Year-Olds

The start date for my internship is looming on the horizon and I realized that I need corporate office-wear.

After tearing through my closet (well, that took about five seconds) I realized I own plenty of skirts, dresses.... a pair of corduroys, khakis, and black slacks.... but no work appropriate tops.

 I've never had a corporate office job, usually working instead in the service industry or teaching swim lessons.

So I have plenty of tees, camis, going-out tops, and a few trusty button downs. GAH.

Of course, I turn to the internet as usual, and this is pretty standard of what I find.

Photo Credit

Barf. Ruffles, florals, bows, paisley blousiness galore. Can I get a hello from the head of the PTA committee?

Is it impossible to find something simple, clean, made of good materials with an interesting design twist and, oh yeah, under $100?
I feel like all these designers take a perfectly good top and decide that what it really needs are all the trimmings swept up from the cutting floor thrown at it.

So the hunt continues for two decent work tops that I can also wear outside of work and don't make me look like I'm five or a soccer mom.

I will keep you updated.

New Year's Resolutions

Happy holidays everyone!

I'm sure you're just as swamped with the holidays as I am, thank goodness for a bit of R&R!
But after we've unwrapped all of those presents, it's time to ring in the New Year, and I'm sure most of you also write up a few resolutions as well.

Looking back on last year's resolutions, I found that I did pretty well, although things like "wear more color" I've abandoned entirely :)

My Resolutions for the New Year

Only buy things that I really, truly love. Never settle for "it's okay"

On that note, continue "capsule-sizing" my wardrobe and other stuff. While I'll never be one of those "everything I own can be fit into a backpack" minimalists, I would like to make sure that everything in my life has a purpose.

Hone my personal style. Take more risks.

Continue with my "eat less meat" or as my vegetarian sister fondly calls it "cheapatarian" routine. Attempt to go fully vegetarian (and possibly vegan? Better take this one step at a time).

Go to yoga more often. These legs are getting stiff from too much running.

Learn java and python :)

Finally set up my website. Seems like everything breaks the moment I turn my back on it.

Learn Spanish. I'm already half-way there with just my daily exposure. And hopefully become fluent in French.

Plan a trip for this year. Perhaps Montreal for spring break? I have a few friends that I need to visit up there, and it is such a fun city.

I always do enjoy planning for the new year and seeing how far I've come in the old.
It's time to celebrate a few accomplishments and learn from a few mistakes.

What are your New Year's resolutions?

Photo Credit

Simplify

I'm currently going through my twice annual "purge".
This year wasn't too bad, only two shopping bags of stuff to sell/give away.

Photo Credit

You should have seen it when I was leaving for college, which I consider the real turning point for me, fashion and life style-wise.
It's when I decided that I wanted to be fashionable. Not just eccentric, but also stylish.
A year or so later, after having to move through three apartments in one year (not fun) I decided I wanted to try to be a minimalist as well.
As always, these are more about the process rather than the end result. I'm not sure if there really is an end for either of them.

But my goal has always been to simplify. I love stuff, but I want it to work for me, not the other way around.

So how to start? The Everyday Minimalist has a great checklist for what to toss. A good clean-out makes everyone feel lighter.

After you've gotten rid of everything that is obviously not working out, how do you simplify your closet?
Try putting a few restrictions on what you own and buy.
Too many options is not a luxury, it's just overwhelming.

Color

Keep a simple palette.
Find some flattering neutrals, and pick two or three colors you know and love. My color palette is limited to black, grey, navy, white (sort of. I'm such a grubby-bear) and a very, very light tan/camel.
My two colors are blue and blush pink.
It keeps shopping simple, I merely skim the racks for my colors.
Also getting dressed in the morning is a breeze. Everything matches, so I can basically close my eyes, grab a top and a bottom and I'm good to go.

Shape

Know what suits you.
I can't do wrap dresses or deep v-necks. I simply don't have the cleavage for it. Big billowy clothes swallow my frame and hang off my broader shoulders (I have a slightly unusual upside-down triangle shape. I'm vaguely shaped like a teenage boy).
However, full pleated skirts, pencil skirts, a-line dresses, and shift dresses loooovveee my shape. Men's button down shirts, turtlenecks, and bateau necklines are positively saucy on me.
Anything high-waisted and either ridiculously wide-legged or ridiculously skinny makes me feel like a complete diva.
So why mess with what works? Know the shapes that love your body and love them back.
Because trends come and go, but no matter how hard I pray, a low slung mini-skirt is not doing my derriere any favors.

Lifestyle

I'm a student. And I walk every-where. I work in retail where I'm on my feet for seven hours straight. But I enjoy going out to the museums, theatres, night-clubs and going to see an opera every once in a while.
So do I really need six pairs of stilettos? (um.... I'd love to own them, but no.) Two will do just fine.
Mid-height or kitten heels, however, are a much better option.
Again, simplifying. Know what you need, not what you want.
Flats are necessity in my life, another pair of drop-dead sexy heels on sale for 80% off? Not so much.

Duplicates

Do you really need five black cardigans? Will two do just fine?
I find myself falling into this trap because there are certain basics that I stock up on: cardigans. black dresses. ballet flats and kitten heels.
But those better have a distinct difference between them. I own a business-ready sheath dress and a jersey t-shirt dress, both black. Different.
I also own three grey cardigans.... two of those are going to be sold on Ebay this week.
If my one grey cardigan busts a hole, I figure I will just have to run out and buy a new one. No sense in keeping back-ups.

Make a List

This is my favorite thing to do. I use Evernote (if anyone's interested) to keep track of what I'm looking forward to adding to my wardrobe, as well as keep inspiring photos or want/lust/need items.
That way, I can make decisions before I'm knee-deep in pretty things and my card is burning a hole in my pocket.
This helps focus my shopping, though if you ask my girlfriends they'll tell you I'm just as a susceptible to a want-attack as anyone else. However, it's easier if I can say "It's not on the list, I don't need it".



Those are just a few of the things that I use to keep things simple and tone down the wants, especially as we go into the holiday season and the after Christmas sales (boo yeah!)

Of course, after I step down off my soap box for today and finish with finals next week, I'll be sure to post my Christmas wish list for this year ; )

Ten

I'm not going to lie that I'm a little envious of those girls that have the perfect capsule wardrobe: ten pieces lined up on a single rolling rack.
Unfortunately, living in the North East the weather doesn't quite cooperate for such a wardrobe, and being young I'm still experimenting and playing with new trends.

But if I wasn't broiling in the summer and freezing in the winter, and I was more settled into my style, my perfect capsule wardrobe would be:

Ballet Flats

Black Heels

White Blouse

Jeans

White T-shirt

Black Blazer

Black Skirt

Cardigan

Black Dress

Trench Coat

Of course, supplementing all of this with belts, scarves, and jewelery.

If I'm being honest with myself I realize that I might quickly become bored with only ten items in my closet.

Minimalism is definitely an aesthetic and philosophy that is very disciplined, and perhaps when I'm older and more settled in my skin and style I would attempt to go fully minimalist.

At the moment however I'll keep my style and wardrobe merely pared down, but I feel like making this list is a good exercise to remind myself of what is actually necessary.



Color Choice

People seem to be very irrational about colors sometimes. I know that I am.

My favorite colors? (apparently black, white, and grey don't count. Boo)

Light blush pink, navy blue, pale blue and wine purple.

Colors I absolutely cannot stand?

Brown. Taupe. Mustard. Green.

They remind me of dirt and food condiments and it makes me really not like them.

Brown I simply don't like because my hair, skin, and eyes are all brown so it makes me feel like I'm going to blend into the wallpaper if I wear it, and that's the last thing I want to do.

Of course, people always point out how someone with my coloring really should be wearing brown, taupe and a bright green (mustard makes my eyes appear yellow, which is a little creepy).

Which by all reasoning is probably true. They do compliment my coloring, but psychologically I just can't get over it. I even am a little hesitant to pull out items for my clients in these colors and refuse to have them anywhere near my own wardrobe.*

 I just don't particularly like them at all.

Am I the only person to limit myself to my favorite three colors and my favorite neutrals?
Does anyone else illogically hate a color, or am I just crazy? (it's okay, be honest ; ) )

*Please don't point out the fact that I love leopard print. It's completely irrational, and I realize that. I don't consider patterns to be colors for some reason.

Photo Thanks to nigel_appleton

The Beast

Just read a great post over at Dramatis Personae about fighting the addictive feeling of shopping.

It was very thought provoking, and as someone who has gone on mini shopping bans with varying results, I know those cravings.

I figure that the first way to deal with an issue is to find out where it stems from.
I know I shop emotionally and consider it "retail therapy".
So I've learned that when doing a shopping ban I can't even go in stores. Can't try the clothes on. Can't even entertain the possibility of "just one little small purchase couldn't hurt" because then I'll just go on a binge.

I've found that looking at things so far out of my price range that it's ridiculous helps.
That keeping a list of things "for when this is over" helps too.
Or cleaning out my closet and playing dress-up with what I have.
Or reminding myself that "yes, there will be another perfect black dress, sweater, coat, what have you, later"
Or realizing that buying this item will not make my stress or my problems go away. It's just a blouse. Not a miracle.
And I'm learning to look at something, admire it, and then put it down. A retail catch-and-release system if you will.

But now that I've actually had one successful month long shopping ban (not very intense, I know. But baby steps) I love the feeling of relief that comes with having a full savings account and not worrying about "how am I going to pay for that?"
But sometimes it does feel like an addiction.
And I find that when I cut back on the shopping it transfers to other habits. I guess the Times was right about it's not what you're addicted to, but having an addictive personality in the first place.

But I just wanted to share my thoughts, because I do think that it's relevant to a lot of women out there, who use shopping as a form of self-soothing. Myself included.

I do feature a lot of pretty things on this blog, and I try to keep a lot of it within a reasonable budget.
I don't believe in spending outside of your means, but I don't believe in denying yourself any pleasure at all.
Yes, shopping makes you feel good. Yes, it can be addictive. Yes, it can be destructive. Yes, if you have the means and the inclination you should be allowed to spend your money however you want. Yes, beauty and creativity is an important part of our psychological health. Yes, fashion is fun.

So there is no point in criminalizing shopping. There will be no finger-shaking here. No praising for abstinence and punishing for participation.

 It is what it is. We just have to understand the beast, and learn to moderate between the credit card bill and all of those beautiful shiny new things.

What do you guys think? Can shopping be an addiction? Or is all of this just a way of justifying a lack or self-control?

Insta-Tailor

Let's talk about pants.

They're good for you, good for society, and generally, people with pants are taken more seriously than those without.

The only reason why I bring up the subject now is because we haven't had to think about pant length for a long time, due to the skinny/straight leg epidemic.

All you needed to know for fit was that they needed to brush the ground when wearing flats (except for a certain generation which insisted on a fingers space) and when wearing heels, well, same thing. There really wasn't an issue with length because they scrunched up on top of your foot whether you were wearing heels or not.
As long as you had a bit of scrunch you were fine.
For more about pants (and other clothing) fit, check out my previous post here.

Now enter the trouser jeans/wide leg/trousers/grown-up pants.

My body tends to do well with extreme styles. Those jeans better be painted on, or high-waisted and wide leg.

Go figure.

So of course I jumped on the super wide leg, high waisted trend.
The only problem is that I like to wear flats, kitten heels, and towering heels, but I don't want to invest in three different pair of jeans (who does??).

So while these look sexy in my platforms, with my usual kitten heels (I'm still not sure about wide legs with flats) they make me sad.
This is not a good look. It's schlumpy and will destroy your hems. BAD.

However, I decided to give this product N*Jeanious a whirl. It's a denim adhesive tape meant for creating a temporary hem.

So you just fold your pant leg inside out.

  Apply the tape.

Peel off the backing.

Give it a firm rub and pat.

And you're good to go.

Check out those sexy hems. Just a hairs-breadth from the floor (again, older generations probably prefer an inch or so, but as for me I like my hems to brush) and when I change my shoes I can just pull off the tape and start again.

YAY!

*Just a few notes about this tape after I've worn it around for a while.

I had to try a few times to get the length even. I realized after that using a tape measure and measuring the amount you're hemming could have been really useful. Duh.

For a really wide hem (as pictured) you might need to use three instead of just two for each hem. The side started to come down a little bit because it wasn't taped.

Other than that, I've been very pleased.